Werner Herzog
2015
128 minutes
This is a Werner Herzog film starring Nicole Kidman. It's a bit like Lawrence of Arabia, except it's about a woman. It's essentially a biopic of British adventurer Gertrude Bell, whose travels and diplomacy helped the British in their colonization of the Near East, which remains a paradise today thanks to their efforts.
T.E. Lawrence actually makes an appearance in this as a character, played by Robert Pattinson in an amusingly camp manner. Still, you'd much prefer to be watching The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, which has "kneel before Zod" Terence Stamp playing a trans woman together with Hugo Weaving and Guy Pearce in drag. That film is 23 minutes shorter and has far less colonization in it.
You're not going to like this film or particularly hate it. Some films are like that. They just crash against your soul with a dull thud and leave you largely unchanged as a person. You could have spent those two hours of your life doing something different and better, but honestly you probably wouldn't have. No need to resent it. Check it off your list and move on. You are one film closer to being a Werner Herzog completist now.
Time to choose something different: